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Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Intruder!

It was all rainbows and unicorns before the "incident."
It's a wonder I've lived to tell this story. Thank goodness, my son saw the SNAKE in my studio before I did. I had worked in there all morning, the useless dog had passed through a couple of times, and all was calm as usual in my happy little world. Then I went to take a shower.

My son came banging on my door shouting something about a snake in the house? WHAAAAA?!!! It seems a small rat snake had found its way inside and decided to take a stroll (slither) around my casa. Austin just happened to walk through my studio and see it.

Ya'll know what a snake magnet I am. If you're not convinced, go here, or here, here or even here.


Anyhoo, we had to tear my studio apart to find the stupid scared snake. He preferred being behind my built-in desks with the electrical and computer cords that look amazingly like...snakes. Go figure. We spent an hour poking him with a yardstick, broom, dust mop, feather duster, and batting-wrapped barbecue tongs. Anything under the desks (alot!) had to come out because the snake kept hiding under stuff. Then we'd shake the item and out would drop the snake who would quickly slither away or try to strike at whatever we were poking him with. I'm sure my screaming didn't help.

We used boxes to seal off the rest of the house and the other side of my studio. I stayed outside of the barriers and offered verbal assistance and tools to college boy. Thank goodness he was home or I'd be touching down in Ireland right about now.


Eventually, we trapped the snake in a Tupperware lettuce crisper and released him into the wild of our neighborhood. Ha ha, you believe that ending? That sucker got bashed to death with a broom handle. And then I nailed his carcass to the front door so all the other snakes in the hood could see. Okay, the carcass-nailing part is not true, but that might have been a good idea.

I'm off to scatter some mothballs.

4 comments:

  1. you are so stinking funny - I love reading your blog! feels like you are sitting across the table talking to me, except in this case ( with snake) I am glad you aren't!

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  2. Holy cow I would have froze and died on th spot!!!!!!!!

    You are brave!!!!!

    Ellen

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  3. Makes me glad I live in New England. Snow is a piece of cake compared to a snake in the studio!

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  4. are you kidding me??!! girl, you need to get a pet hawk. i have never heard of anyone attracting so many snakes. gonna start calling you cleopatra.

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